My sister Olivia of redneck gnooze fame texted me upon seeing the episode wherein I explain that continuous texting, emailing and IMing is now classified as a disorder.

I first thought, “How ironic. She’s texting me to acknowledge receipt of my message about the texting disorder.” I then informed her I’d be posting her […]

Saddam’s regime may have paid to get US lawmakers to Iraq, a massive plane inspection cancels flights nationwide, and the space shuttle Endeavor returns to Earth. Marta Costello hosts the gnooze (the g is silent) - today’s top stories in about 3 minutes.
Wanna order a gnooze T-Shirt? They’re shipping now, and the reviews […]

The Pentagon reassures citizens after accidentally shipping nuclear fuses to Taiwan, hell no, ranchers in Argentina won’t farm and a big chunk of ice collapses in Antarctica. Marta Costello hosts the gnooze (the g is silent) - today’s top stories in about 3 minutes. Wanna order a gnooze T-Shirt? They’re shipping now! And I can […]

When I offhandedly mentioned updating this site with random dog pictures, ne’er in my wild’st dreams did I imagine I’d hit the jackpot so early.
Furthermore I have no explanation for my excessive use of apostrophes.